For Betsy Fagin
the bell signals the bell
the bell imitates the bell
ring, ring, ring, someone is calling you
I guess I have to learn how to
communicate with my daughters
by daughters I mean all of you
my lost sense of self
and playing at arriving
play arrival it makes me braver
like I’m mining blocks of butcher paper
what did I know of against?
what was myself?
here were pictures isolated
here were our faces, inroads
like habit like showing ourselves out
cocky little thing come here
I like how you pronounce yourself vulnerable, as if
just kidding, you say, I was always against and again
I’ve got enough mindful confidence for us all
and what would it mean for it not to be mindful?
one consequence is aesthetic limitations
mechanics of margin, listen, I contest that you
could absent yourself that much
really in 2019 you are telling me
that you wrote a poem without a self in it?
observations without judgements
do not exist but I’ll throw you a bone
I’ll plunge off a bridge
here is the evidence that I exist
pictures of people falling from burning
buildings, listen obviously in this century
to walk without a plan
is akin to indulging in rare luxury
scurry, scurry onwards
if I’m let go in an ecstasy of curiosity
and goodwill at least there’s no note of it
in linear time and you said
be surround, be empty
be contrast
learn about luck
what encourages it
with their own voices
arriving arriving arriving
the desire to move backwards
I felt mountains forming in my hands
it wasn’t a deduction
I’ll put the whole room in my mouth
I said, give me that much at least
being in love roughly
just to spend time with yourself
would that also
be called attachment?